January 2012
9 posts
3 tags
Currently playing "fireworks or gunfire" out here...
…lamest NYE ever.
December 2011
12 posts
3 tags
“If any of our guys smoke or swear in your home, it’s free!”
– A radio commercial for some plumbing or electrical company in Birmingham, AL…
1 tag
“It felt like I was bathing in the lungs of a chain smoking granny….no,...”
– Ben on the body wash he was given for Christmas…it has menthol in it…
2 tags
Ben: *sprays me with the Axe body spray someone gave him for Christmas*
Me: Great, now I smell like someone from The Jesery Shore.
1 tag
Mom: Bugs are dirty and carry diseases!
Ben: So do half the half the hookers in Vegas.
“You’re like an ADD squirrel.”
– Ben, about me.
2 tags
Me: (leaving the kitchen) Carry on my wayward son!
Ben: Peace out, Kansas.
Can I reiterate how much I abhor Hart of Dixie?
DIE!!!!
1 tag
“You’ve corrupted my dogs! It’s only a matter of time before...”
– Ben, to me
2 tags
Ben: [walks into the room] Hey, Shelly! Belly. [evilly, at me] Ruby.
Me: Newman.
Ben: I WAS JUST ABOUT TO SAY THAT!
“It’s the weekend! Time to take my pants off.”
– Ben’s weekend started early… O.o